Boundaries
Do you struggle and feel guilty when you set boundaries? Unfortunately, youre not alone!
Boundaries is a HUGE topic in therapy because they're the foundation of healthy relationships and a strong sense of self-worth. They tell others how you want to be treated (whats okay and whats not okay) and they protect you from being mistreated. In addition, boundaries allow you to have your own personal space and privacy: your own feelings, thoughts, needs, and ideas. They allow you to be yourself rather than an extension of someone else or who someone else wants you to be.
So why is it so difficult to set the boundaries? And why so many people struggle with it?
One of the biggest misconception is that it is selfish. So let's take a look at it:
When plane is having accident they teach to put the mask on YOURSELF first. This way you will be able to help others. If you focus on other before yourself — you mind help and person or two, but eventually you will pass out(which is going to make them feel guilty then in attempt to help the you killed yourself). On another hand, when you put mask on yourself first, you can help much more than one or two people! So is it selfish to put musk on yourself first?? Exactly!
The same story is with boundaries. When you take care of yourself, protect yourself, satisfy your needs, assert yourself and generally speaking take care of yourself—you will bring a better, happier, healthier version of yourself to other people. Your kids are watching you, and the way you treat yourself gives them an example of how they should be treated. Your friends are watching you, your family and many others… people who love you want you to be happy! They don't want you to be mistreated. But how would they know if you never tell them no and never tell them what you need? Regardless how much they love you, they cannot read your mind. So speak up and be clear! You will be surprised how big of the difference in will make in your mental health.
"No is a complete sentence." – Anne Lamont
Mental Health Therapist, Kateryna
Please note:
This post is for general informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your mental health professional or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding your condition.
Boundaries is a HUGE topic in therapy because they're the foundation of healthy relationships and a strong sense of self-worth. They tell others how you want to be treated (whats okay and whats not okay) and they protect you from being mistreated. In addition, boundaries allow you to have your own personal space and privacy: your own feelings, thoughts, needs, and ideas. They allow you to be yourself rather than an extension of someone else or who someone else wants you to be.
So why is it so difficult to set the boundaries? And why so many people struggle with it?
One of the biggest misconception is that it is selfish. So let's take a look at it:
When plane is having accident they teach to put the mask on YOURSELF first. This way you will be able to help others. If you focus on other before yourself — you mind help and person or two, but eventually you will pass out(which is going to make them feel guilty then in attempt to help the you killed yourself). On another hand, when you put mask on yourself first, you can help much more than one or two people! So is it selfish to put musk on yourself first?? Exactly!
The same story is with boundaries. When you take care of yourself, protect yourself, satisfy your needs, assert yourself and generally speaking take care of yourself—you will bring a better, happier, healthier version of yourself to other people. Your kids are watching you, and the way you treat yourself gives them an example of how they should be treated. Your friends are watching you, your family and many others… people who love you want you to be happy! They don't want you to be mistreated. But how would they know if you never tell them no and never tell them what you need? Regardless how much they love you, they cannot read your mind. So speak up and be clear! You will be surprised how big of the difference in will make in your mental health.
"No is a complete sentence." – Anne Lamont
Mental Health Therapist, Kateryna
Please note:
This post is for general informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your mental health professional or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding your condition.
other articles